I was born in 1988 in Gualdo Tadino, in Umbria, into a family who belonged to the Movement of Communion and Liberation. I grew up with my brother Luca, only a year younger than me. I am grateful to my parents who loved us a great deal and transmitted the faith to us from the time we were young.
I remember always having a relationship with God, with Whom I spoke as if He were a friend; but, growing up, this faith slowly began to peeter out. God seemed to be more distant than the things that interested me. It was the encounter with Gioventù Studentesca, the high school group of CL, that fanned this relationship into flame anew. They invited me to the summer vacation and to other meetings. Every time that I went, I experienced a freedom and a fullness that I was not experiencing elsewhere. I felt that I could be myself completely and, little by little, I discovered that the secret of all of this was the faith. At the center of that friendship was Jesus. God, who had seemed to me to be abstract, had become concrete in the face of Jesus and, in particular, in the faces of that companionship. I was 17 and this encounter lit a flame in my life.
At that moment, I thought for the first time about the priesthood. During a Mass at my parish, I imagined myself in the place of the priest during the homily. I remember that I asked my mother: “But what if God were calling me to be a priest? Because I do not want to become one!”. My mother, illuminated by the Holy Spirit, only responded: “Do you think that God can ask you something that is against your happiness?”. I thought nothing more of it. I began university in Perugia where I went to study Physics and where my faith was ulteriorly deepened through the life of CLU, the companionship of university students of CL. I was in love with a girl who did not reciprocate. In fact, this wound left a question in my heart: “But can someone really bet everything on You, Jesus?”. This question also led to extremely significant friendships that still accompany me, with guys who, in different ways, had, like me, begun to bet everything on Christ.
“Do you think that God can ask you something that is against your happiness?”
Towards the end of university, something decisive happened. I was dating a girl I liked and cared about, but I wasn’t at peace and I didn’t understand why. One of the friends I mentioned above told me that he had had the wonderful idea of giving his whole life to Jesus and that this was also a path I could take. I remember only one thought flashing through my mind: “That’s why I’m not at peace. I too could give my life to you… as a priest!” At first, I didn’t take it well and continued to see the girl I was dating, but I was never at peace, and in the end we broke up. From that moment on, I started going to Mass every day because I needed to understand. However, still not satisfied, I thought that perhaps the idea of dedicating my life to Jesus was the result of the company I had surrounded myself with. So I went to Salamanca, Spain, to do a PhD in physics. Those were years of struggle, in which I lived with one foot in the world I couldn’t leave and one foot with Jesus, whom I didn’t want to abandon. I didn’t tell myself it wasn’t true, but rather I repeated, “Not now, later.” Yet the more I ignored this invitation, the more things lost their flavor.
At the end of my doctorate, this thought had become stronger and more concrete, so much so that in the end I said to myself, “Now or never.” God reached out to me through Fr. Tommaso Pedroli, a priest of the Fraternity of St. Charles in Madrid, who one day invited me to lunch. I jumped at the opportunity and told him everything. I began a journey of discernment that led me to Rome, where I was welcomed by Fr. Francesco Ferrari who, together with many other brothers, helped me to understand and, above all, to experience the joy and happiness of finally responding to the Lord with my “Here I am.”
