What you hold in your hands is an ‘impossible’ book. For most men and woman today, everything you have read here is a dream, perhaps a fairy tale, a distant desire, soon stifled by life’s events.
It is impossible for love, born suddenly, to last; it is impossible to remain faithful; it is impossible for differences to enrich instead of divide; it is foolish to think of having children, let alone more than one; it is normal to be crushed by long work hours, unable to find a work-life balance… I could go on almost endlessly, overturning the good news that comes to us from these pages.
Yet, I assure you, the voices speaking in this book belong to real, flesh-and-blood people, whose lives are filled with the same struggles, temptations, sins, and weaknesses as everyone else. So how do they manage to have such a different gaze upon their family? How do they avoid losing themselves in complaints, recriminations, and dejection? Their days are certainly not free from struggles, mistakes, arguments, and angry outbursts. Yet, the overall impression that remains within us after meeting them, even if only on the page, is one of comfort and peace. It is an invitation to live, to embrace the challenge of existence, to not waste time, and to look positively at the hands reaching out to us to help us out of loneliness and meaninglessness. What has happened to them?
A few decades ago, a French journalist, André Frossard, a columnist for Le Figaro and one of the most famous names in French journalism, wrote a book that became a bestseller for many years: God Exists, I Have Met Him. These families have made an encounter. It may all sound too simple, or even contrived, but that is exactly what happened. Encountering other families who were themselves fascinated and attracted by the radiant simplicity of the Christian life completely changed the terms of their being together, of raising their children, of tackling economic and work-related challenges.
It is an invitation to live, to embrace the challenge of existence, to not waste time.
Ultimately, everything is decided in the centre of our hearts when, looking at what happens, we choose the direction of our lives. This decision cannot originate from an effort of will. After all, every love is born from a love received. When others look at us and invite us to join in their adventure, we too become capable of positivity and strength. As a Psalm says, “You have turned my mourning into dancing; you have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness” (Psalm 30: 11-12).
During my ten years as Bishop of Reggio Emilia, I dedicated myself to meeting young families and bringing them together. I believe that this is a privileged path for the rebirth of the human in our post-humanist society and for the rebirth of the Church in this time of great confusion and forgetfulness of faith. The stories we have read are comparable to the new grass that sprouts from the earth in early spring, to the fresh buds that appear on the branches at that same time of year. They need to be nurtured, cared for, they need authoritative presences, but above all, they need to live, to risk, to run. The experiences of community life among families (as well as among priests) continually renew my hope for the future. Christ asks us to live in this time. We may debate its difficulties, but we are not allowed to exhaust ourselves in complaints, inertia, or, worse, in despair. God never ceases to act, and young family communities are one of the most significant fruits of His continuous call to life.
Gianluca Attanasio, Lidia Catalano, Ilaria Giudici
The rule of love. A journey for families in the age of uncertainty
Paperback ed., 2025.
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